Wednesday, April 13, 2011

Everybody Needs Somebody

In a popular kids movie by Disney there is a song that chants "everybody, needs somebody".

God has built in us the need to be loved.

We need the 5 A's. They are Acceptance, Attention, Appreciation, Affection and Adoration

When we are deficient in one of these our view of who we are and everything else is set eschew. There is a natural progression of these needs.

Acceptance - There is a natural needs in all of us to be accepted by others. We have that need with God also. To know we are accepted by another produces an acceptance in us. We feel and rest in a level of a relationship with an individual or group of individuals that fulfills that empty spot we have for being accepted. That acceptance gives us value. We all long to be part of something and we need to be Associated with others in a way that says we belong together.

Attention - Once there is an acceptance there can be a process of attention. Attention cannot be given without acceptance unless it is in the negative. This negative side brings rejection and not acceptance. Negative attention shows us that the person giving it has a distaste for us and brings about the feeling of being rejected. The positive side of this attention brings about the feeling of acceptance in a new level of understanding and glues the relationship together even more. Attention is given to detail in our appearance our speech and in our mannerisms. We find the common and uncommon things about one another through attention. We learn to appreciate those things in each other. We are cared for and loved.

Appreciation - With attention a process of appreciation come about. We learn that as we are accepted and given positive attention, we are then appreciated for the values we have to offer and can produce with others. We begin to see ourselves as a unit and not an individual. We feel a part of something greater than ourselves and we can learn to appreciate others. There is a freedom of knowing that we have value not only in ourselves but without ourselves. We find that there is a joy much greater than what we could produce on our own. We are able to exercise our gifts and be a valuable contribution to the whole.

Affection -  Affection is often associated with a feeling or type of love. PDA is the physical demonstration of affection for another person while in the view of others. Similar terms include: attachment, fondness, good will, kindness, love, passion, or tenderness. Next to acceptance, affection is one of our greatest needs. It is a gentleness that we handle people with and a personal touch that reinforces our acceptance from others.

Affection is defined as:
  1. Bent of mind; a feeling or natural impulse or natural impulse acting upon and swaying the mind; any emotion; as, the benevolent affections, esteem, gratitude, etc.; the malevolent affections, hatred, envy, etc.; inclination; disposition; propensity; tendency.
  2. A settled good will; kind feeling; love; zealous or tender attachment
    Usage note: often in the plural; formerly followed by "to", but now more generally by "for" or "toward(s)"; as, filial, social, or conjugal affections; to have an affection for or towards children 
Adoration - Adoration is love given with deep affection. It is a step further in our process of learning to love. Love requires adoration in order to have any depth. Without adoration there is a shallowness and a hollowness about our relationship with others. Adoration does not imply something physical but something more spiritual in the sense of a deeper appreciation of others. It finds a level of meaning to give homage or worship to someone. You know there is a deeper level of spiritual connection when adoration is present in your relationship of another.

Summary - We are taught by the world to be strong in our own power, Self reliant, and not to be week or needy. It is our way of passage into adulthood. We are taught to buck up and dry our eyes and dig in our heals and pull ourselves up by our bootstraps and many other cliches which are not based on God's truth but the worlds view of independence and self reliance. However God did not make us that way.

God made us needy. Needy for him and one another. Adam was found to be needy for a mate. All the other creations had a partner which provided a companion and partnership as their mate. Man needed a mate also. Woman was created as mans mate with needs as well. The need was for her mate. They together were one and their need was for a spiritual union with God.

We know that their choice was not a spiritual union with God and the rest is history. So God lays the foundation for repentance and restoration through a personal visit to his creation. He had a need also. God needs a mate and in Christ we are his bride. We are the perfect compliment to Gods need for fellowship and the 5 A's.

I ask you to look at your relationship with God today and see if the 5 A's are present. Are you practicing those key elements of a real relationship with Him? If not, why? Are you perhaps not in the practice of demonstrating those traits with people around you? Maybe your spouse, you children, your parents, your friends? If you are having difficulty with those around you then it is no wonder you are having difficulty with your relationship with God. Sounds like it may be time for a "time out" to collect your thoughts and examine where you are with all of this relationship stuff.

Practice the 5 A's. Acceptance, Attention, Appreciation, Affection and Adoration. They will change your life.